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Abalone Recipe

For the preparation of this fine tasty abalone recipe you will need to procure the following ingredients. Get yourself some abalone steaks and a nice big tenderizing mallet. Don't buy that nasty fake butter or margarine, you want that rich, creamy, fully salted real butter, ideally in a huge block purchased directly from a local dairy farm or farmer's market, you know you can't come cheap on a classic abalone recipe. A proper bottle of extra virgin hand-pressed olive oil, organic sea salt, fresh ground pepper, lemons stolen from the neighbor down the street's tree for juice, and parsley from wherever. It's just parsley, nobody cares - they won't eat it anyway.

Whoop out your mallet and pound the hell out of your steaks, making sure the full, flat edge comes in complete contact with each blow, until they reach a quarter inch thickness. This may in fact be the most enjoyable, and therapeutic aspect of any abalone recipe. Pat dry. Prepare your skillet by melting in the butter and adding oil. Once the butter is good and hot and has started to foam, lay in your steaks to begin completion of your abalone recipe. Toss in pinches of salt and pepper to taste, frying for no more than 30 seconds each side. Arrange on a warm platter with parsley garnish, and squeeze lemon juice over the top. Do not ruin your abalone recipe by overcooking unless you like chewy, rubbery seafood.

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